How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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