I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
In America we eat man semen.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
