Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
