dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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