Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
