i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
