No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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