Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
