..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
