the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
