this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
