so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
