After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize