woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
