69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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