Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
