I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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