Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
