I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
