Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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