I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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