...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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