Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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