okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
