This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
