White coat. Heels.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
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