Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
