Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
