Having a random hookup so left but love u
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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