im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
