suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
