i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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