so that wasnt chicken after all
Your dad touched me again.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Randomize
