Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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