guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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