Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
