okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
That reminds me...we need to get swords
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
