Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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