dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
