am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
