the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
