i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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