Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
