oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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