what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
