even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize