Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
