Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
