Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
