How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Just pee around me
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
