Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
