my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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